Pedagogical Devices

Things I Have Said To My Students So Far This Semester:

1. It's like when you leave the house without brushing your teeth. You know something's wrong, but you don't know what it is until you see the bus coming.

2. I don't want to grade your finals.

3. Because you're late. All the time.

4. Just pretend that Barbara Ehrenreich is a murderer.

5. Yeah, you should check out some Norman Mailer. He's good. And he's an asshole.

6. Ok, well answer this question, then: is it early, or am I just totally boring?

7. No. Nope. Really close. Uh ... no. Yes.

8. Obviously the physical thing is not working out for me.

9. This is the Newton end of things. I just thought you should know.

10. Candid teacher moment. So, uh, are you guys learning anything?